Astros Houston

The Astros Did NOT Steal Signs

So this video has been making the rounds today, with people jumping all over the opportunity to try and make a good ole punny “sign stealing” joke:

But the problem with these jokes are not just that they are lame, overplayed, unoriginal, not in the slightest bit funny, but that the idiots making these jokes clearly do not understand how ballpark rules work. Those rules being that a majority of ballparks, including this one, do not allow signs at games. Fact.

I mean the game yesterday where this went down wasn’t even in Houston — it was being played in fucking Florida. And the lady confiscating the signs isn’t an Astros employee — she is part of the ballpark staff:

If these morons would just their little pea brains and think for a second, they’d maybe understand the rationale for not allowing signs at a ballpark. Which is that they are absolutely obnoxious for everyone around them. Could you imagine paying hundreds of dollars to see a game, only to have some asshole 60 year old man with a giant Houston Aestricks sign in front of you the entire game?

Bottom line is this. The Astros are going to have to deal with bullshit all season. Like so:

But we are not sign thieves, so move on and try to enjoy watching Altuve and Bregman hit bombs while you continue to cry about 2017.

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